A mundane daily conversation...

Well this is how I begin my day...quite literally.

Waving my hands for those green and yellow things to arrive - it goes like this :

Me: Braving the cold, waving my hands, landed in a three-sweater layered excessive winter clothing.
(No Reaction)
Again goes my wave...
Someone sees my hands - decides to stop..
Me: Bhaiyya, jaaoge ?
That puzzled auto-driver: Haan, kyon nahin, kidhar jaana hai ?
Me: CP (Connaught Place)
Auto-Driver: CP mein kidhar ?
Me: KG Marg, HT House malum hai ? British Council ke saamne !
AD: Saab, saat (60) rupaye honge.
A bit bemused me, wearing an activist's coat: Saat rupaye ? Mai kya gaaon se aaya hoon ? Meter lagao bhai !
AD: Saab, meter nahin chal raha hai, paise de do
Me: Kya ? Aapke yahan kuch masla hai, mai aapka meter chalaoon ?
AD: Nahin, hum nahin aayenge

(After some bargaining, he lowers it down to 50 - with a sheepish smile on his face and then goes my gyaan-sharing session - Sri Sri Ravi Shankar, are you listening ?)

Me: Aap log yahan meter kyon nahin lagate ho ?
AD: Sir ji, yahan meter se koi chalta nahin hai. Humein lagane pe koi aitraaz nahi hai. Bas yahan ki public chahti nahin hai. Usme humara koi galti hai ?
Me: Main yahaan ka nahin hoon, humare shehar mein toh meter bilkul chalti hai, bas yeh aur Chennai do shehar hai jahan meter ka naam lena gaaliyan jaisa hota hai
AD: Aap kahaan ke ho ?
(A perfect bait for me to push my Mumbaikarisms)
Me: Hmm...Mumbai
AD: Aap bolte ho ki yahan meter nahin lagta, udhar ek kilometer ka rate kya hai ?
Me: Rs. 6.50, abhi aap rone lagoge ki aapko bas Rs.4.50 milta hai. Dilli mein toh CNG ka bhaav sasta hai. Mumbai mein Rs. 28 hai, aur idhar to Rs. 20 - toh abhi bolo - faida kiska hai ?
AD: Sahi hai saab, lekin hum kya karein, majboori hai.
Me: Aap bahut kuch kar sakte ho - pehle apne aap ko sudhar lo, meter daalna shuru karo - sab theek ho jayega
AD: Saab, aap samajhte nahin hai. Idhar yeh nahin chalti.
Me: Yeh toh aapka log roj ka ch***** banane ka dhanda hai boss.
AD: Ab aapko main kaisa samjhaoon
Me: Mujhe mat samjhayiye, khud ko samajhna seekho - b******* aap jo kar rahe hain, woh sahi hai ? Kanuni hai ?
AD: Kya samjhe aap apne aap ko ?
Me: Kuch nahin.

And by the time, this conversation gets into top gear, thankfully we reach outside HT House and I disembark from that auto.

Take out the money from my pocket - give him a Rs. 100 rupee note

AD: Saab, khulle nahin hai aapke paas ?
Me: Nahin, chutta nahin hai (I emphasize on that word, since it comes naturally)

Out comes the change -

AD: Yeh lo bhaisaab.
Me: Agle sawari ko c****** banane wale ho ki nahin ?
AD: Nahin saab, meter daalenge.

Does he switch on the meter or solicit with his sawaari - I dont know. But I had things my way !

These autowallas in Delhi, I tell you are the biggest nutmegs in the planet. Delhi is going to host the Commonwealth Games in 2010, but they must get their public transport systems right before that happens. Autowallas must stop being rogues and act as per the law - for which a law is necessary. The blue-lines must be phased out with immediate effect and those new modern-looking green Tata buses must replace them. The Metro or Matro as they pronounce it here, is doing perfectly fine. I think thats the only way forward for this city, as it takes that pressure off the other public transport systems here. More and more autowallas are on the hunt for dead ducks, who do not know the city well.